Thursday, February 18, 2010

Keep Your Pants On!

Dear U.S. Snowboarders Nick Baumgartner and Nate Holland,

You're so cute!  Going on about the integrity of your sport being compromised by tighter pants!

Let's get a couple of things straight though:

  • Snowboard Cross is not the "red-headed stepchild of snowboarding."  It's infinitely cooler to watch than the half-pipe.  Yeah, it's something when a boarder does flips in the half-pipe, but oh, it's a flip to the right!  Now a spin to the left!  All set to music!  The Snowboard Cross is speed and jumps and competing against people at the same time.  It's exciting!
  • In twenty years (if not sooner), Snowboard Cross racers will be trying anything to shave hundredths of a second off their time.  Tighter suits are inevitable.
  • Snowboarding has integrity?  What integrity?  Oh.  Do you mean you want to "keep it real"?  Snowboard Crossers with tight pants are keeping it real.  They're keeping it real fast.
Just relax and let the sport go through its natural progression.  It's going to, no matter what you think.

Citius, altius, fortius!
Your pal,

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