How Do You Avoid the Drama?

Dear Readers,

I could use some advice.  I'm part of a group, and as you know, when you get a group of people together working for a similar cause, there can be drama.  While this group does work well together and has fun, we still deal with human behavior:  feelings get hurt, buttons get pushed, power is involved.

I'm making a conscious effort not to be involved in the drama.  That means I have to try really hard not to give knee-jerk reactions.  I try not to speculate.  I try not to have an opinion.  I try to keep it fun.

But I've gotta admit, that's really hard to do.  I'm human too, and it's really easy to get swept up in any drama that comes along--especially if work's been a little frustrating, or I'm not feeling like I'm achieving in other areas of my life.

Do you have any tips for keeping the drama out?  I'll take any advice--particularly advice on how I can orient my thinking and actions.  I can't change anyone else, but I can change me.  Unfortunately, it's going to take a lot of practice to make sure I behave the way I'd like to.

Thanks in advance!
Your pal,
Jill

Feeling the Burn

Dear Gilad,

Even though my butt is still sore from Wednesday's workout, I'm getting ready to work out with you again.  I'm kind of hooked on your "Total Body Sculpt" show.  True, my body needs some massive sculpting, and even though I'm not sure a <30 min. workout does a whole lot, it's definitely better than nothing.  I also like the fact that it's relatively stationary and I don't have to try to fit some wacky choreography or scads of equipment in my tiny living room.  Plus, I like the fact that you have an upbeat attitude.  I chuckle when I see the commercial that mentions the Wall Street Journal calling you an "Israeli studmuffin."

I could go on, but I don't think you'd approve. You'd tell me to put down the laptop and pick up my hand weights.  Yes, sir!  I'm on it!

See you in a couple.

Your pal,
Jill

You Didn't Have To!

Dear Mayor Daley,

I'm still stunned about your recent decision not to run for re-election as Mayor of Chicago.  I mean, you're a force, you make Chicago work (If you rearrange the letters in "Chicago: The City That Works," I'm pretty sure you can spell "Mayor Daley."  And if you can't, look again.....or I can have my pal help you take a look.....you see it now, right?).  What will the city be without you?

Although you may think you've accomplished enough, that you maybe don't want to die in office, that maybe you want to do other things with your life, I can tell that you just haven't gotten over my leaving the city yet.  It's OK.  I still love Chicago, and I'm glad I was able to spend 15 years there.  It's just that there were no jobs for the Boy.  We had to go.  I appreciate your grieving the loss of us, but really, isn't this too drastic a measure to take?  You don't have to give up your position just to prove a point.  I mean, it's nice that you think the Boy could come back and get elected as Mayor, but you know, we've just got to do this New England thing for a while (there's a certain Kennedy to emulate, you know).

Chicago's still Chicago even though we're not there.  Give it time, and you'll understand.  Once you do, maybe you'll regain the fire to run again.  And if not, you and Maggie are always welcome to have an extended stay in our guest room.

Your pal,
Jill

Do Jokes Ever Get Old?

Dear Signe Wilkinson,

Thanks to my subscription to the Boston Globe, I've become acquainted with your comic strip "Family Tree." So far I'm enjoying the adventures of the green-loving Tree family, but your Sunday strip had me a little confused.

Sunday's comic had Mrs. Twig bringing dessert to the table for her teenagers and husband. Mr. Twig's way too full and tries to beg off, but Mrs. Twig protests. The son--the teenage son--delivers the punch line, "If the pants won't fit, you must quit!"

An O.J. joke?  In 2010?

At first I thought, well, it's Labor Day, so maybe this is one from the vault.  But the strip started in 2008.  Now I'm just really disturbed that a joke from the O.J. Simpson trial--and a lame one that was overused back in the day--is still the punch line in a comic strip. The trial happened 15 years ago--the comic strip son may have not even been alive when it happened.  Granted, one needn't have lived through the event to use a famous quote from it, but it kind of saddens me that a comic strip--a form of media that keeps pretty current with the times--plays it safe and goes for an easy gag. Or worse, another argument for print media not being relevant anymore.

I hope this was just some cabin fever/end of summer crank out.  From what I've read about you, you have a really impressive career (Pulitzer!), so I'm looking forward to getting to know your strip a little better.  But if you keep beating the old horses to death, it may become one strip I have no problem skipping.

Your pal,
Jill

What's This Country Run On?

Dear Dunkin' Donuts,

Since I moved to the Boston area, I think I've been to Dunkin Donuts more often in the last six months than I have in the last 15 years.  No wonder you think the country runs on Dunkin'--Boston certainly does.

I've been really intrigued by Dunkin' Donuts since we moved here. There are so many of them--I'm within walking distance of at least two.  What also boggles my mind is that many stores seem pretty busy.  I don't get it--sure, breakfast, I can understand a rush.  I also understand people who need their coffee (I'm not one of those--the rumor I heard that the coffee tastes better the closer you get to Boston intrigues me, but not enough to test it out myself).  And if you're a franchise with a Baskin-Robbins, I can understand the evening customers.  But so busy all the time?  Really?

I'm no stranger to Dunkin's doughnuts, but as I started grabbing the occasional doughnut from one of your outlets, I find I want them more than I ever have before.  Did you put something in the water here to make me crave them so?  

Just curious.

Your pal, 

Jill

P.S. --If you're putting something in the water, could you put something in the Coolattas to make them taste better?  The strawberry one is so digustingly sweet.  It sounds refreshing on a hot day, but it's just....blech!  I've been burned twice now--no more Coolattas for me!


P.P.S.--Could you start supplying Congress with doughnuts?  While the country may run on Dunkin', Congress can't seem to get much of anything done.  A good chocolate stick might jump start them, don't you think?

How Do You Celebrate This?

Dear Readers,

Happy Hurricane Earl Day!  Today's the day Hurricane Earl is supposed to come up the East Coast and affect Massachusetts.  Should I be excited about this?

Today I had to drive the Boy to work, so we put on NPR for something to listen to.  Bob Oakes, our local NPR "Morning Edition" host, spent a fair amount of time talking about Hurricane Earl, and he started off one interview by saying, "It's Hurricane Earl Day."  Doesn't that sound like a holiday to you?

Even though I don't think we'll be much affected by the hurricane--we might get some rain and a bit of wind--but overall, Earl's not expected to do much damage.  Plus, it's expected to hit really early tomorrow morning, so if we sleep soundly, we may not even notice anything.

Still, it's our first hurricane experience, and that's kind of cool.  Coming from the Midwest, I don't understand too much about ocean living--true, Lake Michigan is a big lake, but the ocean is a totally different story.  It's fun to slowly acquire all this knowledge about how a different area of the country lives, and once again I'm amazed at how vast and varied our country can be.

It kind of makes me want to celebrate, but I'm not sure quite how.  A Hurricane cocktail is the obvious choice, though I'm not sure I really want to get that hammered today.  The only other thing that comes to mind is making a big hurricane-shaped plate of mashed potatoes.....maybe with a bit of gravy or butter as the eye of the storm.  What other kinds of hurricane fun could we have today?

Looking forward to your suggestions!
Your pal,
Jill

For the Geographically Challenged

Dear Readers,

Today's story was supposed to be one of triumph.  Instead, I got yet another smackdown from my new home.

I've lived in the Boston area for five months now.  In that time I've learned that if I have to go anywhere new, I have to study the map for an insane amount of time, print out directions, and then pray I follow them correctly.  Plus, I have to budget a good 15 minutes for getting lost, which I manage to do pretty much every time I go to a new destination.  If Google Maps says it'll take 14 minutes, it'll really take me 45.  Traffic, construction, crappy winding roads, lack of road signs....it's a far cry from the grid of Chicago that I lived with for 15 years.  The grid is fabulous--streets are straight, they're labelled, and addresses are on coordinates, so you know pretty much where you have to go based on the address number.  I don't know if it's budget cuts or stupidity, but here in the Boston area, if you're on a street, it's often not marked--the cross streets are, but what you're driving on right now--the one you took the wrong turn down--isn't.  It's an absolute pain in the neck.  Now you're lost, and you don't know where you got lost.  Plus, #17 on one street isn't parallel to #17 on the next street--that is, if you can find two parallel streets to begin with.

I'm not bitter.

Anyway, yesterday I went to Cherry Bomb Bakery in Brighton to redeem a cupcake voucher.  Google Maps said the bakery was nine minutes from my house, and as I looked on the map, I realized it was on the same street (albeit a fair hike) as a Trader Joe's, where I also needed to go.  I decided to go to Trader Joe's first, then all I had to do was drive down Washington Street until I got to the bakery.  No map required!

That sounded fine and dandy until I got to the section where Washington was one-way going the opposite direction.  I didn't see this quickly enough and was forced onto the Mass Turnpike ($1.25 toll).  Go figure.  Where would I end up?

I got off the turnpike at the Brighton exit, and was spit out onto Cambridge Street, I believe.  Of course, it took many blocks to figure this out, since the street wasn't marked.  Thankfully traffic was also slow-going, since it was Moving Day, and I, like an idiot, decided to go into college campus territory where there were nothing but moving vans, loaded pick-up trucks, and other assorted vehicles-stuffed-with-furniture on the road.

I eventually drove into an area that I recognized, and from my extensive map study, I was soon able to find where I needed to go.  I was happy to have found the bakery, but it really would've been nice to not have to go way out of my way (and pay a toll) to get there.

Oh, I know what you're saying:  Jill, just get a GPS!  To which I say:  Struggling writer.  Many days I feel that a GPS would be nice to have, but honestly, the little money I do make is slotted for other purposes, and a GPS is far down on my wish list.  I love reading maps, and I enjoy navigating, and the GPS would take that job away from me.  Besides, a GPS isn't perfect either.  It's good, but it's not the end all be all.

Hopefully I'll learn the geography of this area soon.  It's probably time to take more drives, get lost, and figure out how to get home.  Any of you have helpful hints?

Your directionally-challenged pal,
Jill

Fall into Blogging

Dear Readers,

Oh, good grief!  It's been over a month since I've posted anything.  Perhaps I took a nice summer vacation, you think?  Not really.  I did go to Long Island for a weekend of learning about WFTDA roller derby officiating, but a weekend in a roller hockey rink does not necessarily equal a true vacation.  I did have a really good bagel though, so that's something.  [Incidentally, Long Island reminded me a lot of Northwest Indiana--just with bagels and different accents.  It was a little disconcerting.]

Anyway, I have missed blogging, and I've been thinking about how to get back into it.  I obviously am having difficulty coming up with regular ideas for letters to others.  I'm no Charlie Pierce, who's been writing--at least for the 2 weeks I've subscribed to the Boston Globe--open letters to people.  That's for sure.

Instead, I think I'll go for a hybrid Charlie Pierce/Suzanne Beecher route.  Suzanne runs an e-mail book club, which I've belonged to for several years.  I don't always read the books, but I do read her columns at the beginning.  She's a delight to read, and I love the way her column is organized--just a simple note to us readers with some observation about life.

If I combine these two approaches, I hope that I'll be able to get back into the 5 days/week blogging routine.  I think the rest of my writing is suffering a little, since I don't make use of this space that's designed to help me practice my craft.  I'll try to make it as interesting as possible, and I hope you keep on reading (and maybe tell your friends).

Thanks for your patience!
Your pal,
Jill